Constructive: The last sentence of your thesis had me a little lost. Maybe shorten it and make it more straight to the point or split it into two sentences. Also, I’m not seeing how the second quote relates to the thesis. Also, when using your quotes, maybe don’t use the whole thing since they take up a lot of your word count. Keep your words for your analysis.
Positive: I think your other two quotes are very good and the beginning of your thesis has a good flow to it. When writing focus on how you can relate your thesis and ideas to Freire and keep your ideas concise. Focus on the relation of your quotes to the thesis and your main idea.
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